Lessons

There is a park that Bremen likes to visit behind one of the malls (Aupark) in Bratislava. There is a big play area with swings, merry-go-round, climbing walls, etc. They even set up trampolines and motorized cars during the summer for kids to play. It seems that we visit at least once a week.

A while ago Bremen and I spent a Saturday morning at the park. Bremen loves the merry-go-round (it's sort of like a big sit-n-spin that 7-8 kids can sit in) and on this morning he was sitting in it with two other kids. One of the children, about a year younger than Bremen, was being bossy and didn't want anyone touching the wheel in the middle. Bremen loves to go fast. Every time he reached out to spin the wheel, the younger Slovak kid would yell at him (in Slovak). Being more sensitive lately, Bremen would pull is hand back everytime the kid yelled. He looked so sad. He looked like he was going to cry.

I watched him from a nearby bench and found myself feeling bad for him. Here's this little American kid that doesn't understand Slovak, surrounded by other children speaking a foriegn language with one particular, mean little kid yelling at him. He looked at me with those eyes, questioning what to do. I told him it was okay and to go ahead and spin the wheel. Another attempt, more yelling.

I found myself becoming angry. How dare this little kid yell at my child. How dare his parent, standing close by, simply ignore the mean behavior of his child. This is where I taught him wrong ... if this kid was going to be a jerk, then it's okay to be a jerk back, "That kid is just mean, yell back at him."

But of course, Bremen is a better man than me. He didn't yell at the kid. He didn't want to. He sat there and enjoyed the ride. When the kid decided to get off, Bremen stayed on and played with the other children. He didn't let it bother him any longer.

I can't stand seeing him hurt, in pain or sad. Can't I shield him from everything, everyone bad in this world? I know I can't and I shouldn't. It's just so hard.

But of course, Bremen is a better man than me. Maybe I can learn from him.