Saturday, October 13, 2007

My New Favorite Least-favorite Movie

PAYCHECK starring Ben Afflicked and Uma-gosh, I can't believe they pay her for this Thurman

What does it take to make a bad movie? A few key elements always seem to be present.
  1. 'Smell the fart' acting-Thank you Joey
  2. Repeat the main characters problem or question at least four times and maybe it will sink in-audiences are stupid.
  3. Ignore the science in 'science fiction'.
  4. Thinking about the story during the writing process really slows things down.
  5. If something doesn't make sense-just add more flames.

Other movies I can't believe I wasted 2 hours of my life on:

  1. Van Helsing
  2. Reign of Fire
  3. The Transporter (this is one long fight/car chase scene-I swear there's 30 minutes where no one speaks because they're too busy fighting.
  4. Snakes on a Plane (your mother should be proud Sam), although it's just one of those titles you have to see.
  5. Starship Poopers (It's really Starship Troopers, but I don't think anyone will notice)
  6. The Brothers Grim

By the way this came about, because Kevin aquired some movies from a friend and they were given to us in a way which we had no idea what Paycheck was about, so we started watching and then I was mesmerized by it's stupidity and had to watch it to the end. Kevin swears we'd actually seen the movie before and I blocked it from my memory, but I doubt it.

9 comments:

LauraB said...

Glad you posted on movies - I'm going to pick your brain when you're here about The Ring - Patrick and I watched it and we now have need of an expert movie nit picker to help us sort this plot out!! By the way, scary it wasn't - stupid it was!

Sheri said...

I haven't seen any of those (though I'm sure Ian has) except for The Brothers Grimm. I had such high hopes for that movie. Sadly, it felt like 2 hours of my life were stolen from me.

Merilee said...

I havn't seen any of those either. I think I'm pretty happy about that now.

ducklips said...

Thanks for the heads up. Most of those I don't even have any desire to see. I can't believe you even watched Snakes On a Plane.
I do like Van Helsing though. Cheese and all.

Tell Kevin happy birthday yesterday. I hope you all had a fabulous day!

Teresa said...

Well, your list sparked quite the debate in my house over Starship Troopers; must be a guy thing, I agree with you! BTW, you need to add Mullholland Drive -- awful movie!

stuart said...

Star Ship Troopers was a great movie....

Jamie said...

I agree with your list, although Jon would probably debate you about Reign of Fire.

Teresa said...

apparently the men have no taste

Kim said...

My favorite least-favorite movie is: "First Knight". I know I'll probably get boo-ed for saying that. I know a lot of people who actually like that movie. It was torture for me. I hope to never see Richard Gere in a movie again.

I've not seen any of the movies on your list, except for The Brothers Grimm. I agree with Sheri, I felt it had potential, but it was a huge let down.

Also, thanks for commenting on Joe's blog. It made his day. He checks it about every 30 minutes to see if anyone left a comment.